Friday, October 16, 2009
The Truth
4:47 PM | 
Posted by
αмвєя ♫ ∂σℓℓу |
Heyy guys. Many of you have asked me many questions about why I am upset all the time. And, I have good reason, so instead of making you guys wonder and forgetting to tell you guys which would be breaking my promise, I will tell you here:
And all of this is just really affecting me to a point where I don't know what to do, where to go or anything. I feel like I am just so lost in life and in my own little world. But, those are the facts, I'm never in a good mod anymore because this is on my mind 24/7. Thanks guys for understanding.
- My mom has a kidney problem and a problem with her arm
- My dad is having these wierd stomach pains
- My grandparents (both pairs) are fighting with each other
- My grandma has cancer
- My other grandma is always sick and is in a depression
- My grandpa is having heart, blood, and cholesterol problems
- My aunt/Godmother is tryingt to quit smoking but can't and it's really affecting her health. (my other aunt/Godmother died because of smoking (it started as cancer and just went from there where she lost half her face because of it) and so I am worried about that)
- My gerbil died (as corny as that is it makes me upset)
- I am doing really bad in school (I went from straight A's to D's, and I have had straight A's from 4th-7th)
- All deaths in my family are around this time(years ago, but it's the anniversary of their deaths and birthdays): Great Grandma died in August and was born in September, September a year ago my sisters pet died, October my gerbil died, November my longtime friend (he was an ederly penpal, once again corny but sad) died, December is when myother Aunt/Godmother died, a week after my b-day in January my uncle died so you can see it's upsetting)
- I am losing all my friends, including my friend who I felt like was my twin brother because we had everything in common
- I hurt my ankle and it's been injured for a week
- I can no longer sleep through the night
- I woke up yesterday with a sharp pain in my shoulder, hurt my ankle more, had an un-bearable pain in my ribs so bad that I couldn't breathe, I hurt my neck yesterday somehow, and I have had massive headaches after school everyday
- My parents think I have mental issues (LOL)
- My parents think I might be suffering from depression
- I feel like no one believes a word I say or listens to me
And all of this is just really affecting me to a point where I don't know what to do, where to go or anything. I feel like I am just so lost in life and in my own little world. But, those are the facts, I'm never in a good mod anymore because this is on my mind 24/7. Thanks guys for understanding.
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40 comments:
I wish I could help :(
Aww I feel bad for you
thanks, thats why my name always says crying, i took it down so people wont ask because it says why here
I fell bad for you amber :( I know what your going through. My grandmother died recently because of cancer and it really affected me, and I basically did talk to anyone in my family besides my 17-year-old sister. I go on chat a lot and tell me if there is any possibly way to for me to help you.
~Ashley DI
thanks, most people in my family have died from cancer.
my great grandmother, great grandfather, and their son all died of lung cancer. my aunt/godmother died of cancer, my grandma might die from cancer, my other godmother/aunt might die from cancer, and my mom had skin cancer and they think theres a possibility it could carry into our genes and i have a few skin problems already =/
I feel bad for you! :( :( :( :( :(
Also, check out this cool site!
http://wp.me/zI1i
Scikid
i know what all of this is like.
when i was only in first grade, coming home from my best friends birthday party, my mom had told me my grandmother died from breast cancer. i remember her being bald but i was so young at the time i didnt understand.
my really close friend who is only a year older then me has leukemia =[
when i was in 4th and 5th grade i remember thinking about suicide because i was abused..
its really hard sometimes.. but you can pull through. Im really sorry for you!
i have been thinking suicide as well, there are other details to the story, but i dont want to add them cause they are even worse than all of this
I hope everything clears up Amber. BTW, this is the first time I have seen your site and it's actually pretty awesome!
-Your Homie G, Jeepkid7 ;-)
thanks jeep, i highly doubt things will get better seeing as now untop of my luck, my cat is sick possibly with cancer or kidney problems.
Im so sorry :(
thanks =[ now ontop of this my cats sick
hey amber its fiona i won my soccer championship!Im in top 4 teams!This morni9ng i read ur post and it makes me very sad bc last year my great uncle and great-grandfather died.Then when i was in 1st grade i rember playin my harry potter game at home(lol)And then my mom coming home crying and saying my grandma was dead and i did not understand anything!I feel really bad for u,But when ur sad just think bout the bright new day tomorrow!
-fiona828
tomorrow wont be a bright day, all this will still be here
:(
So srry :(
:cry:
thanks =[
Don't wrry amberr! everything will get better soon... but not soon enough...
-Jacquo
i dont think it will. now my cat is in the hospital and its raining. everytime one of my family members is sick and it rains, they die. plus yesterday i heard the song i always hear when someone in my family dies: dead and gone =[ but thanks jacquo
hey amber im very sorry to hear about all of that but its important to not get depressed and keep a sense of humor which you seem to be obtaining just well but all of luck to you.
DONT WORRY AMBER IM HERE FOR YA!
i feel the same way on the very last 1
+alot of pepole bully meh at my skool
i feel all alone in my world
hopefully bad things dont happen to u amber
Tell me if u need anything Amber
AND ALWAYS REMEBER
I luv ya amber!
~Cookie538
Hey everone they is getting depressed LIKE AMBER! plzz listen to this song at www.youtube.com this is what the song is called - broken this song is by- lifehouse
Amber U R THE 1 I WANT TO SEE NOT CRYING and being listenin to dis song plzz listen to it I HOPE UR KAT DOSE NOT PASS AWAY! luv ya ~Cookie538
CHECK OUT ALL OF THESE SONGS
Artists-falling up
song-broken heart
this 1 will make ya laugh
Artist-kj-52
Song-do yo thang
Artist- Hawk Nelson
Song- California
artist-Jeremy Camp
Song-Tonight
I feel for you Amber...
All of my friends left me last year...
My friend Rachel just left me a month ago...
My old best friend calls me a dork behind my back...random but whatever...
I learned that my other friend only taled to me to get to one of my friends that she liked...
I am lucky I not be picked on, just have no friends...
I hate all the people in my school pretty much...
But on a happy note, hwen are you coming to Boston? It is MY city you know! But really that would be so cool if I met you...I could have a REAL friend...
My "other friends" think you are some freak 40 year old guy with no life...
I don't think that...
You are a true friend...
- Matt P
i JUST got backfrom Boston, it was fun. but they only have red sox stuff there. =[ and im not a 40 year old, i have boston pictures to prove it. LOL. and this is the second time in a year that i have lost my friends
You have to show me and I can tell you how far away I am from there! I know you dislike the Red Sox, but how much did you like it other than that? Did you like or super cool suspension bridge?
Yeah I lost So many this year it really sucks. I wonder if I would stillhave my old friends if I never moved three years ago.....
Hope ur kitty feels better!!! Also, I agree with Matt, I really wish I could meet you in real life, one time I randomly started talking about CP in school, and the ppl i met like u, matybon,mattypan, CD, pax and other ppl that i want to meet and my friends stared at me like i was starting to go crazy lol
~Ashley DI
it was really good. we were there for the freedom trail and that was only for 1.5 hours (the best 1.5 hours of my life for reasons) and other than that we actually walked around for 5 hours! i made a new friend, a yankees fan, we were kinda outsiders... we went up to every store and we asked if they had yankees gear and they gave us dirty looks. and he made sure i didnt get lost, cause i would be one to get lost, and he made fun of me because of the stupid pigeons that nearly dive bombed us (but he and my other friend ducked) so i picked on them back =]
OK i know for a fact today is the 20th AND im not sure why amber is not paying attention to me... u better amber...lol im jk. I JUST HOPE UR KITTY gets better!
PS: Dont feel bad
At 5:00 am this morning I lost my great great grandma :( & truth is i really loved her alot and now she is outta my lifE? I always think wen someone leaves its to soon but it rely isnt It was raining were i was at. It started at 1:00am till 12:00 pm
Some thunder no lightning yet but a song came up on the raido station i listend to called ( I lost a friend) was the song the artist is (the fray) this song makes my eyes tear up this song means alot to me when someone leaves. IF U wanna no the music i listen to which is awsome in ur car u should have a radio turn it to 90.1 it is called air 1
I miss u amber
below this is wat happend
hard in my life
1. Lost great grandma
2. Lost 1st best friend from swine flu
3.Lost 2 second best friend in car aciddnet
4. Lost hamster named ginger
5. being tuched by a kindnapper
I will tell u the story private amber...it gives meh the chills
6.I figured out my dog has cancer
7.ppl say i got anger issuses ROFL ( i dont think so :P
so ppl dont feel bad
Amber we have to talk!!
You dont mind if I ask what the reasons were, do you?
Ugh...today sucked....I got stuck sitting with Rachel again...and she was all like Matt you freak, or I would say something like I'm tired and she would be like "You were probably so reckless thinking of the friends you actually have that trust you" and one time she was like, "Naomi, how many friends don't you have, like who hates you" and Naomi answered. And she would aske Me, but say "Oh, Matt...it would probably be som much easier to name the friends you DO have..it would take a lot less time and there wouldn't be as much for me to have to sit and listen through" I was like you little......grrr
But I HATE her SO MUCH
OMG is that U ALEX?
MY GOSH yea! how do ya kno my name... wait Eldia?
yup its meh! i havent talked to ya in a long time ever since we met again in Texas!
This is like myspace! We reply quickkly eh?
There are two thingsthat is upsetting me
1.CP's been flooding so from about the anniversery party and still now i can't get into CP.
2.I am really scared about my 5th grade SS test coming in about 2 weeks.
I feel bad for you Amber I really wish I could help you. =(
awwwwww.................... i feel so bad, and i kinda know how u feel
my mom treats me like a baby,
she always takes my brothers side in fights,
evry 1 bullies me,
my brother has swine flu,
my bff alyssa has swine flu,
my uncle had a stroke,
my other uncle spends all his time moping around or w/ his girlfriend
my mom thinks im emo, just b-cause i bought alot of black shirts and lace-up-to-the-knee shoes
i hate my life
thanks =[ my mom thinks emo also, i have some other stuff i cant/dont want to mention, i have been sick for 3 weeks, thats not normal. my parents dont care about that at all though. and im tired if living my life, its not a good one and it just gets worse by the day.
i know how u feel, so dont think ur the only 1
(btw, i look horrible 2, i think my hair isnt naturally curly...... its naturally frizzy!!!!!)
and evry1 makes fun of me cause i luuuuuvvvvv stirling knight!!!!! :(
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